WHY A BIRTHDAY SILLY
Shirley and I have a very special friend, Kay, who is having a special birthday today – and who is unable to celebrate the event in the way that it should be celebrated.
I also realise that many readers have been in the same COVID boat (including me) or will be, in coming days or weeks – not able to spend the day with family and friends.
So today is SILLY COVID BIRTHDAY DAY.
A very special birthday wish to Kay and all the readers (and their families) who have been in the same situation - or will be soon. Happy Birthday.
Now please click on the following to get into the mood ………….
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=OBIbdWD6EPU
There is more music below.
EDITORIAL
It was interesting to get some responses about “Mary” losing then finding her bundle & her mojo. Refer Silly No 33.
One reader thinks that he may have “lost his marbles”. Another reader lost a Wednesday.
So, if you see any lost marbles or a lost Wednesday please let me know.
Another reader has advised me that she had a need to go out. So, she donned the lipstick, as you do, and headed out – looking lovely (my words, not hers). Before she and hubby left their car, they donned masks, then looked at each other. Why the lipstick if I am gunna wear a mask? Two smiles appeared.
I have it on good authority that none of the above people have lost their sense of humour.
Please send me any similar stories. I am happy to leave your name out, or change it.
DEAD PENGUINS - WHO KNEW?
Did you ever wonder why there are no dead penguins on the ice in Antarctica? Where do they all go?
Wonder no more! It is a known fact that the penguin is a very ritualistic bird and lives an extremely ordered and complex life. Penguins are extremely committed to their family and will mate for life, as well as maintain a form of compassionate contact with their offspring throughout the remainder of their life.
If a penguin is found dead on the ice surface, other members of the family and their social circle have been known to dig holes in the ice, using only their vestigial wings and beaks, until the hole is deep enough for the dead bird to be rolled into, and buried.
After packing the ice back in the hole, the male penguins then gather in a circle around the fresh grave and sing:
"Freeze a jolly good fellow."
"Freeze a jolly good fellow."
You really didn't believe that I know anything about penguins, did you?
ISLANDS IN THE STREAM – REMAKE
If
you like the Dolly Parton / Kenny Rogers duet you should get a smile out of the
following:
FOOTLOOSE
While you are in the mood get up and dance to the following birthday music. There is some great music and dancing to watch & hear ..........
Turn it up loud.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=f8FliT43ZC4
If you liked that the following is the same music to different dancing ....
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=0rLhJZTHYo4
SHORT STORIES
A tennis ball walks into a restaurant.
Waiter asks: "Have you been served?
-------
I asked for a rare steak.....
It was that rare it was scarce.
-------
What is the main cause of dry skin?
Towels.
-------
I gave away all of my dead batteries.
Free of charge.
--------
I just changed my computer login password to “Alcatraz”.
Now the “Esc” key does not work.
-------
A man in an interrogation room says “I’m not saying a word without my lawyer present”.
Policeman: “You are the lawyer!”
Lawyer: “Exactly. So where is my present?”
-------
What is the downside to eating a clock?
It’s time consuming.
-------
ImageI bought a dog from a blacksmith.
Ten minutes after getting home he made a bolt for the door.
------
What do you call a deer with no eyes?
No eye deer.
------
There was a one-legged man at the ATM this morning.
He was checking his balance. 12
-------
What is DARK spelled with a D and not a C?
Because you can’t C in the dark.
Joke 1
I was walking past a pet shop today when I saw a sign on a cage that read: 'Pedigree Netherlands cat for sale'. I didn't believe it could be from Holland, so I went in and asked the assistant: "How Dutch is that moggy in the window?"
Joke 2
A tourist is wandering through a graveyard in Vienna when he hears music. He looks around and decides that the music is coming from a headstone that reads Ludwig van Beethoven 1770-1827. Then he realises that the music is Beethoven's 9th and it is being played backwards. He asks the caretaker to explain.
"I would have thought it was obvious", the caretaker says "he's decomposing".
Joke 3
I was visiting my daughter last night when I asked if I could borrow a newspaper.
"This is the 21st Century", she said. "We don't waste money on newspapers. Here, use my tablet."
I can tell you this ... that fly never knew what hit it ...
Joke 4
Jokes should not be directed at particular racial or ethnic groups, so:
An Englishman, a Scotsman, an Irishman, a Welshman, a Ghurkha, a Latvian, a Turk, an Aussie, a Kiwi, a German, an American, a South African, a Cypriot, an Egyptian, a Japanese, a Mexican, a Spaniard, a Russian, a Pole, a Lithuanian, a Swede, a Finn, a Dane, a Romanian, a Bulgarian, a Serb, a Swiss, a Greek, a Singaporean, an Italian, a Norwegian, a Libyan, a Muslim, a Christian, a Hindu, a Buddhist and an Ethiopian went to a night club.
The bouncer said, "Sorry, I can't let you in without a Thai."
NOT QUITE YOUR IRISH MUSIC....
One has to admire the skill, choreography, and synchronicity of these Chinese – and appreciating such a Celt dancing style and music, so foreign to their own.
MY INCONCLUSIVE TRAVEL PLANS FOR 2020
I have been in many places, but I've never been in Cahoots. Apparently, you can't go alone. You have to be in Cahoots with someone.
I've also never been in Cognito. I hear no one recognizes you there.
I have, however, been in Sane. They don't have an airport; you have to be driven there.. I have made several trips there, thanks to my friends, family and work.
I would like to go to Conclusions, but you have to jump, and I'm not too much on physical activity anymore.
I have also been in Doubt. That is a sad place to go, and I try not to visit there too often.
I've been in Flexible, but only when it was very important to stand firm.
Sometimes I'm in Capable, and I go there more often as I'm getting older.
One of my favourite places to be is in Suspense! It really gets the adrenalin flowing and pumps up the old heart! At my age I need all the stimuli I can get!
And, sometimes I think I am in Vincible but life shows me I am not.
People keep telling me I'm in Denial but I'm positive I've never been there before!
ImageI may have been in Continent, but I don't remember what country I was in. It's an age thing. They tell me it is very wet and damp there.
So where to next!!
CELTIC THUNDER
Start the day with a foot tapper, and click on both of the following:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-iP27eatYxE&feature=share
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=sTKJUxl8TL4
SEEN ON TSHIRTS
⦁ 4 out of 3 people struggle with Maths
⦁ I thought growing old would take longer
⦁ When I was a KID I wanted to be older ………
⦁ This crap is not what I expected.
⦁ Of course size matters.
⦁ No one wants a small glass of wine.
⦁ To me “Drink Responsibly” means don’t spill it.
⦁ How am I supposed to trust you when you keep running away every time I untie you.
⦁ Never laugh at your wife’s choices. You are one of them.
⦁ My wife says I only have two fault.
⦁ I don’t listen and something else ………
⦁ My body is a temple – Ancient & crumbling. Probably cursed or haunted.
⦁ I am who I am.
⦁ Your approval isn’t needed.
⦁ Buy the shoes. No point in being he richest one in the cemetery.
⦁ Scientists say the universe is made up of protons, neutrons and electrons.
⦁ They forgot to mention morons.
⦁ Today I was a hero. I rescued some beer that was trapped in a bottle.
⦁ Does running from my responsibilities count as cardio?
⦁ My heart says chocolate and wine, but my jeans say, for the love of God woman, eat a salad.
⦁ I may be wrong but I doubt it.
⦁ A little grey hair is a small price to pay for all this wisdom.
⦁ My husband thinks I’m crazy, but I’m not the one who married me.
⦁ Some days the supply of curse words is insufficient to meet my demands.
⦁ Twinkle twinkle little stat. Point me to the nearest bar.
⦁ If you can’t laugh at yourself, let me do it.
⦁ If I say I will do it – I will do it. No need to remind me every 6 months.
⦁ Pubs. The official sun-block of Ireland.
HAPPY BIRTHDAY KAY, AND OTHERS
I finish the Silly Birthday issue with some great iconic Aussie music. Each have great messages - but are just great to listen to .....
SLIM DUSTY MEDLEY (check out the campfire)
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=p46JjmUUv98
JOHN WILLIAMSON PERFORMING RAINING ON THE ROCK WITH WARREN H WILLIAMS (check out the great Aussie scenery)
JOHN WILLIAMSON PERFORMING TRUE BLUE
If you shed a tear or two, that is fine. I did.
PLEASE REMEMBER
That laughter is the best medicine. If you cannot laugh try to phone a friend, particularly one who is a good listener. 12
Is there anyone who would love to get a phone call from you?
Please stay well and as happy as can be.
The bear is after a cuddle.
*** End of Issue No 34 ***
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